She flies from set to set, from face
To face. "Say cheese!" she cries
And flashes her bulbs at startled eyes
That go bright blind for a little space.

"Gotcha!" she crows. We all complain
We were not ready . She flutters
Away, snapping her gum and shutters
At open-mouthed victims again and again.

The camera never lies, she avows:
Its images are true:
Aunt Bonnie has red eyes, a blue
Neck, and gaping holes for a nose,

While Uncle Einer's really cross-eyed,
And Uncle John's so dim
We'll always wonder if that's really him
Or a victim of subarctic frostbite.

Myself I won't describe except
To say I hope to God
I don't look anything like so odd,
With my eyes closed as if I slept

In deeply stupid unconsciousness.
She makes us look as scary
As old woodcuts in a bestiary.

But maybe, after all, that's us.